Sunset Over the Mekong River

Sunday, March 24, 2019

Nothing to Say

I have nothing to say
and hugs are too far away.

Then (Job's three friends) sat down with him on the ground for seven days and seven nights, yet no one spoke a word to him, for they saw that his pain was very great. -- Job 2:13

I have to admire Job's friends for their behavior. At least for the first week.  It could not have been very easy for them. Job was probably not a pretty sight with all his festering sores.  He was probably groaning a lot.  And wafting up from his wounds would probably be something that, to borrow a phrase from George Carlin, "could knock a buzzard off a shit wagon".

I remember the day I got a phone call from my mom, telling me my sister's husband was killed in a freak motor vehicle accident.  Since I was the sibling that lived nearest, I dropped what I was doing to make the 5 hour drive to her house.  When I got there, I don't think I said anything, I just wrapped my arms around my sister. There wasn't much use in my voicing what we would have agreed upon: "this really sucks."  It wasn't the time for platitudes.  It was the time to just be there.


1994 Christmas in Wolcott family pic 4
The Russell clan men when Mike was a part of it

One of the disadvantages of our current vocation is that we are far from family.  There are times when we just want to be there with them.

Now my sister, who already lost one husband, is dealing with her second husband having a rare form of cancer.  Because this is not a common cancer, it is hard for doctors to give any prognosis.  No one knows how long my brother-in-law has left this side of heaven.  Whatever it is, from our perspective, it is not enough.  And while I can FaceTime my friends and relatives, it is not the same as being there.  And even when I FaceTime them, it's not like I want to say a lot.  I want to be in their presence as much as technology allows us from across the waves.  I would like just to be with my brother-in-law even at times when he hardly has strength to acknowledge me.


Christmas at the Haskins 51
Precious memories with George and Family

Last week, some of our co-workers were visiting a nearby country.  While driving one night, they struck another vehicle. One of our friends was killed.  Others ended up in a small hospital with not a great standard of care.  I just wanted to be there to comfort my friends.  Not to say anything in particular. Just to be there.

Remembering good times with some who have moved on to heaven

When returning home after a long journey, I have lots of stories to tell my wife.  But when we first get back together, the most important thing to be communicated doesn't require me to say anything. Words can wait.

There are many times when no words need to be spoken—times when words might actually disrupt important communication that needs to take place.  These are the times it is hardest to be away from family and friends. So we resort to using words, even though it is not our favorite option. And sometimes we may say something awkward because it is awkward to even say anything at all at that moment.

Meanwhile, we look forward to that day of great reunion—when being separated from loved ones will no longer be an issue.  When gestures of comfort will no longer be needed, for there will be no sorrow for which to receive it.

He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death will not exist anymore—or mourning, or crying or pain, for the former things have ceased to exist. (Revelation 21:4 NET)