Traditions

Family traditions.

We grow up with family traditions. Without thinking, we assume we will carry these on all our lives. When we marry, we have to figure out how to blend two sets of traditions, which can be a source of conflict. Then we end up adding our own spin on things and figure we will pass these new traditions down to our children.

Christmas tree from the early years
before Alan was taller than the tree.

One tradition I remember is that on one of my brother's birthdays (December 15th), we would drive down the hill to a Christmas tree farm. Dad would go pick a tree his height and we would cut it down, bring it home, and decorate it.

On Christmas Eve, we were allowed to open one gift.

On Christmas morning, we kids were up early. We were allowed to open our stockings early, while our parents were sleeping. Then we would have breakfast. The staples of Christmas breakfast were scrambled eggs, Brown 'n Serve® sausages and Pillsbury Pop 'n Fresh® cinnamon rolls—two kinds: orange glaze and caramel topping. To drink there was orange juice and hot chocolate served in Santa Claus mugs.

Modern version of traditional Christmas breakfast

Ingrid's traditions were a bit different. Christmas Eve was a time to celebrate in the church, where the children would receive a Christmas Tüte, a brown paper bag with treats inside. In her house, the parents set up the Christmas tree on Christmas Eve while the kids were out of the way.

I remember our first Christmas together we had to work out what our blended family traditions would look like. What things would we like to pass on to our children? Even the Christmas cookie offerings had to be figured out. From my childhood there were almond snowballs, Starlight mint surprise cookies,  thumbprint cookies (yuletide gems), and peanut butter blossoms. Ingrid brought Pfferneuse (which for many years Ingrid's mom made and sent to us) and Stöllen into the mix. Both of us were used to the sugar cookies and cookie-press cookies. A sister introduced us to almond Rocha.

But then there were no children. No one to pass family traditions down to.

And then we ended up living places where we could not get the things we associated with family traditions.

So we improvised. One year, some friends sent us some coconut-based fruit cake. They did this for several years and eventually we started making our own. A new tradition was born, added to the various cookie receipts we inherited from our families.

Many years I ended up making my own cinnamon rolls. Brown 'n Serve sausages were seldom an option, but usually we could find some other kind.

When we lived in Haiti, after breakfast on Christmas Day, we would drive two hours to our mission's main office to have dinner with the other missionaries. Then we would head to the beach house in Montrouis for a few days. There they had palm trees naturally decorated with green, coconut-shaped ornaments. Now that's my kind of Christmas tree.

Montrouis, Haiti, a nice place to spend Christmas

One year we spent Christmas Eve in Morro Bay. In our hotel room on Christmas morning we turned on a television station that had a video of a burning fireplace with Christmas carols playing. Lunch was a picnic on a cool, misty beach with smoked salmon and crackers.

But this year, things are really different.  In addition to the usual busyness of Christmas outreach events (one of which was on Christmas day), we are preparing to leave for the US for a few months shortly afterwards. So our theme for presents was things that took up no space and had no weight. There is also a lot of prep to do before traveling back to North America. Add to that all the stuff to do for visa renewals.

Who has time for Christmas? Not much time for tradition. No Christmas cake this year. Limited variety of Christmas cookies.

No tree this year—not even our tiny artificial one. But we did take out some manger scene ornaments and set them out on a table.

Christmas Eve was mostly working. So for Christmas Eve dinner, we picked up a cooked ham leg at the grocery store on the way home from rehearsing music.

I did not make homemade cinnamon rolls this year, as we are trying to empty our cupboards and didn't have all the ingredients. But there was some leftover sticky rice in the freezer from some Khao Lam someone gave us a couple weeks ago. How about we add some cinnamon and coconut milk to that? And there were some British-style sausages in the freezer, too. No orange juice, but fresh oranges instead. Thus, Christmas breakfast is born.

On Christmas Day, I told Ingrid that as I thought back over all of our Christmases together, there is only one constant tradition—that we spend it together.

I was never one for much in the way of Christmas decorations, and this detachment from tradition makes that tendency even stronger. But this year even I felt myself missing some of the trappings of the season.

Some may decry me for lack of "Christmas spirit" since I don't buy into all the glitter and glam. But, on the other hand, I think I have even more "Christmas spirit," for what makes Christmas special is not a tree, or stockings, or a fat man with a long white beard in a red suit. The Spirit of Christmas is the Spirit of Jesus, whose birth we celebrate on this day.

Here in Thailand, many think that Christmas is Santa Claus' birthday. That is probably more true than I like to admit, because December 25th is more closely associated with Santa Claus than it is with the actual birthday of Jesus. I actually don't have a problem with separating Jesus from this celebration of   stuff that happens each December, because I don't think Jesus is all too happy if we get the latest toys and tech gadgets and then let those things take us further from Him. The greatest Christmas present of all time was wrapped in cloth and lying in a manger.

It makes no difference if we have the greatest nativity scene in town and then live our lives as if Jesus doesn't exist.

We may not have much in the way of Christmas traditions, and even if what we do have should pass away, I pray that my heart, like a manger, will continually be a place where the Spirit of Christmas dwells.

The angel said,

Fear not, for behold, I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord. 

Luke 2:10, 11